When asked this question, we normally answer with our name, occupation and maybe tell them where we’re from. But who are you, really?

ONE. You could start to define yourself by naming your values. I’m not referring to implanted attributes you think you should value — but the principles you truly live by. Dr. John Demartini published an outstanding video, that helped me figure out what was important to me. He taught me, that all I wanted to know, I could find, when shedding a light on my inner world. Look closely at how you spend your time, what you prioritise and what feels like work to you; and I promise, you’ll get one step closer to your true Self. Here’s the link to his video. 13 Questions with Dr John Demartini — YouTubeYouTubehttps://www.youtube.com › watch

TWO. By reading more and more self-help-discover-who-you-are books, I’m realising that this quote is becoming more and more true for me.

Maybe it’s about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.

PAULO COELHO

In order to become who we were meant to be, we need to dig deep enough in the sand to find the seeds that allowed the palm tree to grow in the first place.

Ever since our childhood belief sets, values, right’s and wrong’s and subjective realities have been implanted into our minds. To live a life true to you, it’s inevitable to discover what your own thoughts and beliefs are, and which ones you just adapted, without really identifying yourself with them.

In my life I’ve learned, that solo travelling really does that work for me. As soon as I get on a train, bus, plane, boat; my mind switches. Suddenly my thoughts flow much freer and they are incredibly positive. The realisations I’ve had about myself and certain situations in my life on train rides in the past month were incredible.

When travelling alone, you naturally will spend more time alone too. The other day my thoughts were spinning and turning around the same few points for hours. I was overthinking what could’ve been done differently, putting myself in a victim position and forgetting who I really was. Suddenly I snapped in and told myself — Nele you are my best friend. We will have to share this head space for many more years, why not make it a place worth living? Let’s be friends and figure out the real problem. Let’s dig to the root of this and answer our own questions.

THREE. You are your best friend. You can be your biggest critique too, to ensure your Ego stays small, but you’re the only one who’ll stick around you forever. Start working for you in your own favour. It’s the most important relationship you will nurture in your whole life. If you don’t respect yourself, how can you expect others to respect your limits, beliefs and boundaries? Define your boundaries. Nobody will do it for you if you don’t take time to reflect on this. By the way, the right time to work on yourself will never come. Even when life gifts you a pause from routine, you won’t do what you always wanted to, if you don’t set the active intention to do so.

FOUR. One important question is who are you. But what about who do you want to become? If we don’t set goals in life and for the next week, months, years — we will grow much slower. The universe will never gift you anything, if it doesn’t see you working for it. How do you expect to harvest fruits from trees you didn’t even plant?

Chosen growth is the most painful one, but the wings you create, will ultimately teach you how to fly.

Focus your energy on what you’re really passionate about. I know there’s a spark inside you, that drives you. We’re all driven by that something, that gets us out of bed in the morning. That something that makes your heart shine brighter and your soul grin wider. We are defined by the output we create to help others around us. We are defined by the genuine connections we build within communities. We are defined by how much good we contribute. I believe that we are defined by what we make of the tools life puts in our hands. Be you. And be everything.